I was listening to the radio the other day, and a lady was sharing her experience of getting raped in Lagos. She was on the way from work at night and she was crossing the pedestrian bridge when three men attacked her, led her to an empty school building, beat her, took all her stuff, and raped her… and then beat her again when she did not act like she was enjoying the sexual activity…

I was really saddened and hurt by what happened to her.

And as I sat there listening, I could almost hear people saying “why was she out at night?” “why was she walking alone at night?” “why did she take the pedestrian bridge?” “why didn’t she have a weapon with her?” “why did she dress provocatively?” “Why did she follow them to the school building?” “why didn’t she scream?” etc. etc. etc.

It seems whenever someone says she was raped, people all of a sudden look for ways the victim could have been guilty of what happened to her…

Yes I believe in dressing conservatively, but even if she was walking around in just her bra and panties, nobody had the right to insert anything (not his hands, or his private part, or any other object) into her private parts or touch her without her permission.

And so this lady, like many others (1 out of 3 women in Nigeria) will try to keep going, fighting the suicidal thoughts, the fear of men, the depression etc… While Nigerians continue to encourage men to touch their daughters, sisters, mothers, and wives in ways that are too vulgar, and too graphic for me too even write.

Please let’s talk about rape.

May God help us. May God bless Nigeria.

NYC #7Creative Commons License Thomas Leuthard via Compfight

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