Blog - Page 28 of 45

(39) Spend time getting refreshed – Beat Loneliness | 57 Ways

THIRTY-NINE. (57 Ways to Beat Loneliness & Depression)

Spend Time Getting Refreshed

So I was learning about the animals in the Bible the other day and I learned about how eagles live a long time, but they are able to stay youthful because they shed their feathers and grow new feathers. I thought about how life is supposed to be like that. We spend so much time being busy that we don’t realize that our lives are falling apart.

God has promised us that He will satisfy our desires so that we can be renewed like an eagle. (That excites me!)

Whatever it is that refreshes you: Spending time with God, reading a good book, taking long walks, talking to friends, whatever it is – just do it.

When you feel tired, feel discouraged, feel like you want to give up, and there is no hope, remember to spend time getting refreshed!

Remember life is meant to be peaceful and exciting!

(38) Stop "Waiting on God" – Beat Loneliness | 57 Ways

THIRTY-EIGHT. (57 Ways to Beat Loneliness & Depression)

Stop “Waiting on God.”

It feels great to say that you are “waiting on God.” You are waiting for him to do something. Whenever He gets ready, he will do it. You feel holy, and pious and spiritual and well…after all it’s important to learn to be patient.

STOP!

God has already done everything He will ever do. He has done His part. It is up to you to trust Him and do what He tells you to do. No I’m not advocating for you to do whatever you want to do and hope for the best. What I’m saying is stop doing nothing, just because you are waiting on God to do something. Instead go out and live the life God has called you to live.

Have faith, and God will show you the amazing things which he has ordained for you since the beginning of time. Resist evil and accept good, God has already commanded you to fight, don’t say “He’s allowing this to teach me something.” No! God allows WHAT YOU ALLOW.

There’s a different between waiting with patient expectation, and waiting because you never know what God will do.

Remember life is meant to lived eagerly.

(37) Imagine it's someone else's problem – Beat Loneliness | 57 Ways

THIRTY-SEVEN. (57 Ways to Beat Loneliness & Depression)

Imagine it’s someone else’s problem.

You can’t have survived for so long without learning how to solve problems. While we hate having problems, there is a thrill we get when we find the solution to a problem that seems to come out of nowhere just in the nick of time!

While it is often easier to help other people solve their problems, we often find it hard to solve ours because we are so busy with all the emotions involved that we forget to be rational. So give yourself 10 minutes to imagine that whatever your are facing (loneliness?) is someone else’s problem. Imagine that one of your best friends comes to you complaining of how lonely and tired she is. She doesn’t think she will ever find the “right guy,” and she doesn’t think that the “right guy” would even be interested in her.

What would you say to her in that situation?

Whatever it is, march yourself to a mirror right now and say it to yourself!

Remember you are worth the best, and your life is meant to be lived with the best.

(36) Stop cussin' yourself – Beat Loneliness | 57 Ways

THIRTY-SIX. (57 Ways to Beat Loneliness & Depression)

Stop Cussin’ Yourself

Our tongues are very powerful!

When I was younger, my older brother and I would get into fist fights. Since he was bigger and stronger than I was, I would have to result to using my words:

“You’re so stupid, you’re the stupidest idiot in the world…stupid idiot!”

To which we would start fighting again, and the cycle would continue…

The thing about calling people names and using profanity is that we only do it because we are ignorant of how to express ourselves better, or we are too lazy to attempt to express ourselves better. When we get angry and call someone a 4-letter curse word, we have not expressed to them why we are angry, what they have done to make us angry, how we can solve the situation, or how we can prevent the situation from happening again. All we have done is temporarily eased our anger, but in the end the words we use affects us more than the people we use them on.

Depending on who it is, the person may just ignore us and go on with their lives, while we continue fuming for days, and let the anger fester in us.

On another note: some people argue that using curse words is great in music or other artistic forms because it shocks the system. Those people would be wrong. Yes it shocks the system, but it expresses nothing. Why not shock the system by expressing yourself, which is what art is really supposed to be about.

Remember in life whatever you give to others is what comes right back to you. When you cuss others, you’re actually cussin’ yourself.

(35) Garbage In Garbage Out – Beat Loneliness | 57 Ways

THIRTY-FIVE. (57 Ways to Beat Loneliness & Depression)

Garbage in Garbage out

When I first started learning to use a computer in school, the instructor told us about the magical way the computer worked:

Garbage in = Garbage out

If you put in the wrong thing into the computer, you get the wrong results.

Our minds are a gazillion times more complex than regular computers, but the same premise remains, we have to be careful what we put into our systems.

There are times when I get really upset and all these curse words bubble up from inside. Keep in mind that I don’t use curse words, I believe that only lazy people curse because they would rather not take the time and the energy to express themselves more clearly – but that is a discussion for another time. And sometimes the curse words that come to my mind are so creative and so unlike anything you may hear regularly, that when I sit down to think about it I realize I heard the curse words in a movie (sometimes many many years ago).

For example: who told you that you have to close your eyes when you kiss, or that the only way to avoid panty lines is wearing a thong, or that it’s normal to get sick every time flu season hits, or that it’s okay to curse people out when you get angry? We learn from what we surround ourselves with, and we never forget what we take in.

Don’t think you can watch all the romantic movies, soap operas, tv shows and read all the romantic books out there and not be affected. 99% of the romantic stuff out there is garbage…and what you put in always comes out…uglier.

Remember life is meant to be lived freely.

(34) Consider the less privileged – Beat Loneliness | 57 Ways

THIRTY-FOUR (57 Ways to Beat Loneliness & Depression)

Consider the less privileged.

The other day I found myself reading an article in Poize Magazine about Stephanie Okereke and her struggles to help end VVF (Vesico Vaginal Fistula) in Nigeria. VVF often occurs when girls are forced into marriage at a very young age and have prolonged labor, or during the various forms of female genital mutilation. And yes the practice continues today.

Many of the girls (and women) suffering from this ailment are victims simply because they were born where they were born, and in the families they were born in. They were not promiscuous or careless. They were just born in the wrong place at the wrong time to the wrong family. And the only treatment is re-constructive surgery. VVF is not a condition I would wish on my worst enemy (to really understand what goes on, read the article), and yet people are suffering in silence and shame everyday because of this condition.

Yes we all have problems, but sometimes you must take time out to be thankful that you do not have other people’s problems.

Remember life is meant to be shared.

(33) Lose Some – Beat Loneliness | 57 Ways

THIRTY-THREE (57 Ways to Beat Loneliness & Depression)

Lose Some.

Life is not a battle. Yet we spend so much time fighting. We always have to be right about everything. One time I was arguing with this guy over his consistent tardiness whenever we were to hang out, and he argued that he was not late at least one time, to which I retorted I was sure he had been late, but he was lucky that I was too late to realize how late he was… yes that was literally our conversation, we both kept trying to prove the other person was wrong until he finally suggested that we stopped arguing about who was right and focus on the more important issue at hand.

It’s amazing how passionate we get about our own perspective and our own “rightness.” But sometimes it is more important for us to let go of being right and instead let peace reign. Would you rather be right or would you rather be happy? I must confess sometimes I feel like I would rather be right than be happy, but being happy is always a superior choice.

Lose some arguments, let the other person feel heard, no matter how right you may be (or you may think you are).

Remember life is meant to be peaceful.

(32) Always do the right thing – Beat Loneliness | 57 Ways

THIRTY-TWO (57 Ways to Beat Loneliness & Depression)

Always do the right thing

A friend of mine recently confronted me about using the online library resources for a state I no longer lived in. He was right, I was stealing. Even though he joked about it, and even though I had really good reasons and excuses, I could not deny that he was right, so I had to stop.

In this life we will always have to choose between right and wrong. When the right choice is easy, the choice is easy, but when the wrong choice is easier, we must learn and train ourselves to still choose the right choice. Yes it may be hard, yes it may be painful, but the right choice is always worth it. The right choice always rewards us in many more ways than we could have ever dreamed.

Choosing to do the right thing builds us up inside, and makes us happier with who we have chosen to be. And trust me, doing the right thing looks good on you!

Remember life is meant to be celebrated. Daily.

(31) Learn to Quit – Beat Loneliness | 57 Ways

THIRTY-ONE (57 Ways to Beat Loneliness & Depression)

Learn to Quit

Growing up I was always told that winners never quit, and quitters never win, but sometimes we have to quit. We have to quit things (or people) that are bad for us, we have to quit doing work we are not passionate about, so we ca spend more time pursuing our passion. There is a time and place for everything, including quitting.

Quiting is not giving up, it’s choosing to focus your attention on something more important. Quitting is not losing confidence, it’s realizing that there are more valuable ways you can spend your time. Quitting is not making excuses, it’s learning to be more productive, efficient and effective instead. Quiting is letting go of things (or people) that are sucking the life out of you so you can do more things that will bring you strength.

Go ahead and quit something today.

Remember life should not deplete you, but should fill you with the energy to continue strong!

57 Ways to Beat Loneliness & Depression 21-30

Hey everyone, I hope you are enjoying this series on beating loneliness – I enjoyed researching and blogging about it.

For those who may have missed a day, I have everything organized here for you.

21. Laugh
22. Start a Business
23. End Bad Habits
24. Speak
25. Pay Off Your Debts
26. Forget What you think Other People are Thinking (about you)
27. Spend Time with Kids
28. Pick Intimate Friends Wisely
29. Set Goals
30. Give

Please leave a comment to let me know what you think about the series!

I enjoy hearing from you all.

Thank you for sharing this time with me.